February 9, 2009
Today we had to say good-bye to Miri.
I've emailed and talked to friends, updated the website
and wrote her eulogy in our March newsletter.
We had to increase her
dosages on her meds on Saturday and then I took
advantage of the spring-like weather and brought
Miri and Benny out for a swim on the pond--and I am
so glad I did.
Sunday she was barely eating. Her eyes were tired,
her breathing labored and I could see pain beginning
to ebb over discomfort. This morning I brought her
in for a warm bath to get a closer look and really
evaluate her. Normally she lets me know when she
wants to come out of the tub and it is usually
within 5-10 minutes and she only lets me blow-dry
her for about 15 minutes before absolutely insisting
that I take her back to the barn. Today… nothing… I
lifted her out of the tub and blow dried her until
she was thoroughly fluffy and then brought her back
out to the barn to sit with Benny for a few last
minutes while I called the vet.
As with the others who
have gone before her, I held her in my arms, on a
blanket and pet her and talked to her even after I
saw her last breath ease out of her lungs. I’m sure
her best friend Glory, who died last August, was
there waiting for her and was there to take care of
her for a change. Even so, she did not let go
of her last breath until I promised her that I would
take good care of Benny and she didn't need to worry
February 9, 2009 ... This is one of
the last photos taken of our beautiful girl
She really fought the
good fight. I suspected she had cancer last spring,
I could tell by her behavior. The vet only confirmed
it in December and we predicted she would only
survive another week or so. She made it all the way
to February and enjoyed every bit of it until
yesterday and today—and even then, she was cuddled
up with her boyfriend Benny. Her ashes will be
returned here and she will forever lay in peace
beside her life-long friend Glory.
February 9, 2009 ... This is one of the
last photos taken of our beautiful girl
I dare say a breath of
relief came into Miri’s lungs the day she came here
and we embraced both her and Glory. And I know how
happy she was. The only sad time for her was after
losing Glory and before meeting Benny… just that one
month and I doted over her left and right during
those weeks. But once Benny came, she found herself
again and lived every single day happily and safely.
When I came home, I went out to the pens and topped
off all the food and refreshed all the hay and
waters and I wondered if she came to take a last
peek--to see things from a different perspective. I
hope she enjoyed watching Benny walk out to the pond
and then swim with the girls: Jezebel, Princess,
Vida, Deirdre and Jelina out on the pond. I’m sure
it made her smile and know that she can move on and
know that Benny boy will be just fine.
Splashing Miri February 2, 2009
I went out to
the barn in the hopes the other ducks would bring a
smile back to my face and shine their light into my
I let Benny walk to
the pond with ALL of the barn hens and they had a
blast together. He hasn’t been out with all the
girls since fall. For months he has only gone
swimming with Miri. Jezebel and Jelina seem to
prefer his company most. Jelina likes all boys, but
I suspect Jezebel sees a bit of Elijah in Benny. I
saw them talking together for a few minutes.
them all back up to
the barn they began preening and relaxing… and that
is my healing...
But I can't help
but wonder what Benny is thinking now that Miri is
missing. And then I began thinking... what was Miri
like as a duckling. So innocent and so trusting, so
happy... She and Glory both came from the same home.
Originally there was a boy with them. Three little
ducklings. When the owners moved away and left them
behind, a predator (probably a fox) took the boy.
Neighbors picked up the two girls, built them a pen
and took them in for years before Glory's legs
buckled and they no longer wanted to care for them.
I could tell they favored Miri and I could see the
way Miri fawned over Glory. But what were they like
as little ducklings, before the pain came... before
their lives changed... I wonder... What were they
like before they learned fear and sorrow... And is
that the happiness they both feel now that they are
together again today... That's what I wonder...
I have to save
more. I have to help more. I must take this pain
away from these abandoned and mistreated animals and
show them that there are people who will never stop
caring, who will never leave them behind or grow
weary of them. Some of us will love them and
remember them forever. FOREVER...
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